(CNN) Ivanka Trump sat down on the "Fox & Friends" couch for an interview Monday morning. On its face, such a sitdown could have been quite newsy. After all, Ivanka is not only a senior adviser to President Donald Trump but also his eldest daughter and, as such, perhaps the person the President trusts the most in the world. If there was anyone who could shed real light -- and insight -- on Trump's first year in office, it's Ivanka.
It didn't turn out that way. At all. Rather than ask any sort of probing questions about the tax cut plan, the Russia investigation or the Republican loss in Alabama last week, the hosts seemed to fight over who could fawn over Ivanka (and her father) best.
Below, the 9 lamest "questions" the hosts asked Ivanka. Where appropriate, I included her response. And shout out to CNN's DJ Judd for the transcription.
This one, from Brian Kilmeade, was the FIRST question asked of Ivanka. Good way to start an interview! "So, you've finished the race. And lapped the field! How does it feel?"
Steve Doocy with a hard-hitting question about the tax cut package. The best part? Ivanka's response. "Uh huh."
The frame of this question from Doocy feels like it has a bit of a partisan angle, no? Maybe it's just me. Unrelated: Why do Democrats oppose giving middle class people more money? WHY WOULD THEY DO THAT???"
This is not, strictly speaking, a question from Kilmeade. It's not even a question un-strictly speaking. It's more a recitation of White House talking points.
In case you missed this: Trump = Reagan. Also: Dooooooooooocy.
Ainsley Earhardt gets in on the action here with the classic let-me-ask-you-a-super-open-ended-question-about-a-topic-that-is-right-in-your-wheelhouse. You'll be stunned to know that Ivanka was really glad for this question and went into a detailed answer on her trip.
"We need welders, we need plumbers." -- Steve Doocy
"Welders make more money than philosophers." -- Florida Sen. Marco Rubio
This is the only acknowledgment in the entire interview that things might not have always been totally perfect with the Trump administration. Of course, it was asked in the context that everything is totally good now -- thanks to Ivanka!
In sum: Tax bill is good -- despite Democratic opposition! Going to pass -- despite Democratic opposition! Also: Ivanka is the best!